hell yes lets make some ravioli
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
