Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Found your dick twin last night
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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