Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
you had me at cake vodka
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
