you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
