are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
