Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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