are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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