Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
