So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
