Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize