Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize