No awkward lesbian experiences without me
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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