She announced her abortion via fbk
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
