weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize