I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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