you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
How does one acquire holy water?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Randomize
