brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
