Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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