wanna go halves on a baby?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
