More tranny stories later!
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
