he wants to bone in the snuggie
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
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There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
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I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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