Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
