Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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