My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
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Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize