it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
