apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize