Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
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