16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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