what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
