If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize