My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
