Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
