i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize