Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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