you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
