I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
