there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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