Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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