I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Farmville is her only friend.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Randomize
