just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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