He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize