let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
