Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
NoShamevember. You game?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
