I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
ok first of all what the fuck
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
