The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I pour the whiskey from now on
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