I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
