eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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