I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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