Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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