Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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